Love #InTimesOfCovid - cupid playing its tricks in this tricky situation!
What do I know of Love?
I'm a single 40 year old after all, who hasn't had a relationship in a 100 years, like literally. But then, love is love, and everyone can have an opinion on it, their set of imagination of it, their set of expectation of it, their set of questions on it. As do I. And in this COVID time, when I'm sitting by myself, locked up at home, of course the mind wanders in all directions. Love is the most evident direction - alas, im cliched like that but what to do.
Actually its this article I read on how China saw a surge in divorce rates because couples were locked in together for 3 months - at first it just sounded funny but then it left me wondering about human relationships. Are relationships really that fragile? Can the broken never be mended? Are most relationships broken in a sense?
I guess there are maybe 3 buckets that relationships can be viewed in (yeah that's the pathetic corporate part of my brain that keeps wanting to surface in this blogiary) but anyway....
#1 - Strong healthy relationships, all's well in fool's paradise
#2 - Evidently broken and somewhat broken relationships
#3 - Budding relationships that could go either way
And I wonder what impact COVID is having on each. This period of complete lock down. Where partners can either rescue each other or kill each other. And apparently popular belief is (going by that insanely funny video of Option A and B on who would one like to be quarantined with), it appears murder on expressway is the norm.
Lets take #2 bucket for instance. A lot of my friends of course talk about how all's not well in paradise. How communication has broken down, how there is constant snapping and no common ground anymore. How lack of time has made hearts grow distant and how its the child thats the glue that binds.
COVID is an unprecedented situation and maybe unprecedented times call for unprecedented mindsets. And so I wonder, for relationships in #2, can cupid strike in the form of doing chores together? Can cupid strike by playing board games together with the family? For the amount of time people have on their hands right now, is it possible that one allocates a few hours everyday thinking, "in this time bracket, I will do everything my partner wants". The rest of the hours one can go back to sulking about how their universe has been unjust to them. Maybe? Is it possible to say "hey, today lets watch what you want to watch on TV", 'coz of course we understand that in Non-Covid times, when days are hectic and time little, one just wants to watch their TV as their unwind time. But right now, time is ALL we all have. Its not going anywhere, like really, its NOT going anywhere. Its only Day 4 of lock-down here - sighhhhh. So yeah, Time has finally become less of a luxury - are we making the most if it?
The point is, is it that tough to put the other person ahead of you, just for a bit? I mean I have no clue and so I wonder. Someone you have spent years with, had a child with, built a home with, is it really THAT tough to re-discover common grounds? Maybe its just the will that's needed and if COVID doesnt change the way you have thought about your life, then what will?
Lets take relationships in #1 - i guess the best way to continue the fools paradise is to NOT COMMUNICATE. I mean, now that there is so much time, one must find ways to continue being delusional about time. Communication - the "lets talk" would obviously be the slippery slope here. But don't even talk about who's mopping the floor better or who's cooking with lesser mess. Maybe just Don't talk. Maybe.
As for #3 - enough is being written about it in this #TimesOfCovid. Only if ALL relationships could be like this, forever. Or maybe they can. Maybe its time people switch back to their single modes and rediscover love all over again. So while single people are planning movie dates from their respective homes, couples can do the same from their respective bedrooms. While single people are spending endless hours chatting on whatsapp, you married guys could do the same from 2 ends of your homes. Like single people are sexting, guess what - you can do that and then convert it into the real thing too, after enough tension builds up!
Actually yeah, build up that healthy tension with your partner, single or otherwise. Share playlists, day dream vacations, make Post Covid to-do lists together, dress up with nowhere to go - who cares as long as you have someone to appreciate your effort, open that bottle of wine, share old pics, remember younger crazier days and VACUUM CLEAN. Your home and your heart.
Come to think of it, Cupid is in your imagination, single or not. So trick these tricky times to your advantage. And thank me later for this blog, if you do manage to get inspired by a single girl's world view of relationships and my unsolicited "advice" to married couples and hope for single folks out there:) Naive as it may be.
Stay safe, stay loved and see you on the other side of COVID. And next with Memories #InTimesOfCovid - the antidote to this all.
I'm a single 40 year old after all, who hasn't had a relationship in a 100 years, like literally. But then, love is love, and everyone can have an opinion on it, their set of imagination of it, their set of expectation of it, their set of questions on it. As do I. And in this COVID time, when I'm sitting by myself, locked up at home, of course the mind wanders in all directions. Love is the most evident direction - alas, im cliched like that but what to do.
Actually its this article I read on how China saw a surge in divorce rates because couples were locked in together for 3 months - at first it just sounded funny but then it left me wondering about human relationships. Are relationships really that fragile? Can the broken never be mended? Are most relationships broken in a sense?
I guess there are maybe 3 buckets that relationships can be viewed in (yeah that's the pathetic corporate part of my brain that keeps wanting to surface in this blogiary) but anyway....
#1 - Strong healthy relationships, all's well in fool's paradise
#2 - Evidently broken and somewhat broken relationships
#3 - Budding relationships that could go either way
And I wonder what impact COVID is having on each. This period of complete lock down. Where partners can either rescue each other or kill each other. And apparently popular belief is (going by that insanely funny video of Option A and B on who would one like to be quarantined with), it appears murder on expressway is the norm.
Lets take #2 bucket for instance. A lot of my friends of course talk about how all's not well in paradise. How communication has broken down, how there is constant snapping and no common ground anymore. How lack of time has made hearts grow distant and how its the child thats the glue that binds.
COVID is an unprecedented situation and maybe unprecedented times call for unprecedented mindsets. And so I wonder, for relationships in #2, can cupid strike in the form of doing chores together? Can cupid strike by playing board games together with the family? For the amount of time people have on their hands right now, is it possible that one allocates a few hours everyday thinking, "in this time bracket, I will do everything my partner wants". The rest of the hours one can go back to sulking about how their universe has been unjust to them. Maybe? Is it possible to say "hey, today lets watch what you want to watch on TV", 'coz of course we understand that in Non-Covid times, when days are hectic and time little, one just wants to watch their TV as their unwind time. But right now, time is ALL we all have. Its not going anywhere, like really, its NOT going anywhere. Its only Day 4 of lock-down here - sighhhhh. So yeah, Time has finally become less of a luxury - are we making the most if it?
The point is, is it that tough to put the other person ahead of you, just for a bit? I mean I have no clue and so I wonder. Someone you have spent years with, had a child with, built a home with, is it really THAT tough to re-discover common grounds? Maybe its just the will that's needed and if COVID doesnt change the way you have thought about your life, then what will?
Lets take relationships in #1 - i guess the best way to continue the fools paradise is to NOT COMMUNICATE. I mean, now that there is so much time, one must find ways to continue being delusional about time. Communication - the "lets talk" would obviously be the slippery slope here. But don't even talk about who's mopping the floor better or who's cooking with lesser mess. Maybe just Don't talk. Maybe.
As for #3 - enough is being written about it in this #TimesOfCovid. Only if ALL relationships could be like this, forever. Or maybe they can. Maybe its time people switch back to their single modes and rediscover love all over again. So while single people are planning movie dates from their respective homes, couples can do the same from their respective bedrooms. While single people are spending endless hours chatting on whatsapp, you married guys could do the same from 2 ends of your homes. Like single people are sexting, guess what - you can do that and then convert it into the real thing too, after enough tension builds up!
Actually yeah, build up that healthy tension with your partner, single or otherwise. Share playlists, day dream vacations, make Post Covid to-do lists together, dress up with nowhere to go - who cares as long as you have someone to appreciate your effort, open that bottle of wine, share old pics, remember younger crazier days and VACUUM CLEAN. Your home and your heart.
Come to think of it, Cupid is in your imagination, single or not. So trick these tricky times to your advantage. And thank me later for this blog, if you do manage to get inspired by a single girl's world view of relationships and my unsolicited "advice" to married couples and hope for single folks out there:) Naive as it may be.
Stay safe, stay loved and see you on the other side of COVID. And next with Memories #InTimesOfCovid - the antidote to this all.
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